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“Where are you? Kate is being so evasive,” he whines.
STOP WHINING TO THE GIRL YOU ASSAULTED ABOUT WHY SHE WON’T TALK TO YOU.
“I’m in Seattle.”
“What are you doing in Seattle? Are you with him?”
IT IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.
THINK OF EVERYTHING THAT IS YOUR BUSINESS, AND THEN THINK OF THE OPPOSITE OF THAT. THAT IS WHAT THIS IS.
SHE COULD BE DOING BODY SHOTS WITH THE POPE AND IT COULD NOT BE ANY LESS OF YOUR BUSINESS.
I hate José so much. Take how much I hate Christian and multiply that by a billion and that’s my feelings on José. What a dick.
He hasn’t even actually apologized yet! He’s all “oh I want to do it in person.” MAYBE SHE DOESN’T FEEL COMFORTABLE SEEING YOU IN PERSON, YOU PERENNIAL DICK-BLOSSOM.
So Ana says she has to go (thank goodness) and reenters the conversation between Christian and his mom, and then Grace says she’s going to leave them alone (she knows what’s going down. She says “I see you have other plans,” which is basically code for ‘DAYUM, SON, GO GET IT IN!’). When she says goodbye to Christian, she doesn’t touch him, which I guess is supposed to give us some kind of questions and provide the opportunity for later character development, but, as always, I do not care.
After Grace leaves, Christian is all brooding and weird because José called Ana, which is probably evidence of some kind of dangerous jealous streak which will manifest itself later on in the book when Christian murders José (which I wouldn’t mind, frankly) and Ana (which I guess I should mind…but I wouldn’t…oops). And then Taylor (Christian’s body guard, who apparently lives with him? I SMELL A BEAUTIFUL LOVE INTEREST. CHRAYLOR FOREVER) tells Christian that there was some problem with the “Darfur shipment”? Idk. I guess it’s something businessy.
After Christian is done making business calls, he gives Ana the contract and asks her to research more about BDSM on the internet, because obviously the internet is full of reputable resources when it comes to actual information about BDSM.
[It actually is full of reputable resources about those kinds of things, it’s just hard to find them sometimes because they’re buried underneath the Ocean of Porn that is the internet].
Oh, and then we find out that Ana doesn’t have a laptop. Probably because she’s soOoOo quirky and unique. Ugh.
And then Christian says he’s going to get dressed and Ana says she’s going to make a phone call, to which Christian replies:
“The photographer?” His jaw clenches, and his eyes burn. I blink at him. “I don’t like to share, Miss Steele. Remember that.” His quiet, chilling tone is a warning, and with one long, cold look at me, he heads back to the bedroom.
She just said she was going to make a phone call! She was going to call Kate, first of all, but more importantly, it’s a goddamned PHONE CALL. Last I checked you can’t push a dick through a phone call, I think your precious property is safe, jesus.
SHE ISN’T YOUR GODDAMNED PROPERTY, CHRISTIAN.
YOU COULD HAVE SAID “Monogamy is very important to me, so if you want to sleep with other people while we’re together, I don’t think this will work.”
WHAT YOU DID SAY, WAS: “I already think of you as my property and the thought of other people touching my stuff makes me cranky. I will probably forbid you from hanging out with other guys in the next chapter or so.”
Christian Grey is the worst boyfriend you could ever imagine. Why are women so into him. That’s seriously the theme of this book for me. Fifty Shades of WHY THE FUCK IS EVERYONE SO IN LOVE WITH THIS CREEPY, MURDER-STALKER MONSTER-DICK WEIRDO?
Oh! And Ana didn’t even want to call José! She was going to call Kate! WHAT THE FUCK CHRISTIAN LET ANA HAVE FRIENDS.
[except Kate is definitely more of a threat to Christian than José is…]
So then they leave to drive back to Vancouver, and Christian is being all stand-offish and weird now (surprise surprise), and Ana is thinking about the whole situation and how she doesn’t understand him and about how it’s ridiculous that she can’t talk to Kate about sex because of him and his Non-Disclosure Agreement (yes, Ana, that IS ridiculous. Maybe you should not sleep with him).
“Stop biting your lip, or I will fuck you in the elevator, and I don’t care who gets in with us.”
I blush, but there’s a hint of a smile around his lips.
THAT SOUNDS A LITTLE LIKE A RAPE-THREAT.
I know she would consent, because she just does whatever Christian tells her to do, but still. What. The. Fuck.
Are you seriously telling me that if a dude is that into me he will threaten to have sex with me whether or not I consent, all because I did something to turn him on?
WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT.
I DO NOT UNDERSTAND.
WHY DOES CHRISTIAN GET SO PISSED OFF WHENEVER ANA DOES SOMETHING THAT TURNS HIM ON.
JESUS. H. CHRIST. STOP IT.